The Fault in Hazel
by hem1121
Summary: A fanfiction of The Fault in Our Stars


The Fault in Hazel[a]  
Hazel is in a hospital bed, coughing again[b]. It is early in the morning, too early for Hazel and Augustus. Hazel is weak and out of it, her parents had to rush her to the hospital because fluid built back up in her lungs, due to thyroid cancer[c]. Augustus himself has osteosarcoma which resulted in a prosthetic leg, [d]and he feels great sympathy for Hazel. They were supposed to use Augustus's wish he received from the Make a Wish Foundation to go see Hazel's favorite author, Peter van Houten, to figure out why he ended one of this books so suddenly. Augustus knew the trip was probably out of the question now, and he began to feel distraught. Augustus pulled out a cigarette in the hospital room, and puts the killing thing in-between his teeth, although he doesn't give it the power to do the killing. He never lights his cigarettes.[e] He loves metaphors as much as he loves Hazel.  
Augustus doesn't care about being cool; he just wants to be remembered. But Hazel knows eventually no one will remember you. The world has to go on without you-and Augustus does not like that. Does Hazel remember me when she is sleeping? He wonders. There is no way he could forget her. She is his labor, his sun, and his love.  
Hazel begins to open her eyes and notices her breathing tubes.  
"Where am I?" she asked confused. She had been in a daze.  
"You're in the hospital; your lungs had too much fluid again. But it's okay you'll fight this, I'll fight for you."  
"Don't worry about me, Gus. I'm okay." Hazel says quietly.  
Augustus looks into her green eyes, trying to give them life. Hazel had only been in the hospital since this morning and it's now late in the afternoon. But the doctors don't sound too convinced that Hazel is going to get better any time soon[f]. Gus took ahold of her hand, noticing its rough texture. After sitting in silence for a while Hazel exclaims,  
"What are we going to do about our trip?!"  
Gus jumped at her question and then calmly stated "I'll find a way to figure out why Mr. Houten ended the book the way he did. I could email, call, or text him even."  
"That's not the same, but I appreciate your effort," Hazel states.  
Night began to come along with doctors and nurses into Hazel's room, so Gus stepped outside for a bit. He retrieved a laptop from his car and began to look for Peter van Houten's email. He wanted to make Hazel proud. He searched and finally found an email, petervanhouten .  
Dear Mr. Houten,  
"Hello. My name is Augustus Waters. My girlfriend, Hazel Lancaster, and I have read the one and only book that you wrote. At her request, I am writing to find out why you ended the book so suddenly, in mid-sentence[g]. I hope you don't mind that I had to creep on you to find your email address. But anyway, I am disappointed because Hazel and I were supposed to take a trip to come visit you, but she took a turn for the worse and is in the hospital. It would mean a great deal to her if I could tell her why you ended the book that way or maybe you could continue writing the ending? I'm worried about Hazel and I think this would be the perfect way to cheer her up. She was thyroid cancer and isn't doing well, and I have osteosarcoma, so we are in a bit of a messy situation right now. Hazel loves your book; she has read it a million times. She has asked me too many questions about the ending and of course, I have no idea, only you do. But I know the questions are still in the back of her mind no matter if she is sick in the hospital or healthy. The questions she asks are more reader response questions than literary criticism questions, so please provide the information you are willing to give away to answer them. Also, if you do decide to write the ending or another book but would rather not publish it, I'm sure Hazel would still enjoy reading it. I have to admit that I would as well.  
I would appreciate this, very much so,  
Augustus Waters."  
Later that night, after putting a cigarette in his mouth, Gus went back to Hazel's room to sleep in the chair beside her. He knew her parents usually stayed in a hotel and hoped they had already left. Once he got off the elevator and seen her parents, he knew something wasn't right. For, it was 1 in the morning. They both were quiet, not playing on their phones quiet, but like they had heard terrible news, quiet. So Gus began to walk past them to see what was going on with Hazel, but before he could get too far, her mom said, "Gus, there's something we need to tell you." His heart sank to his stomach and he could see the tears rolling off her mom's eyes.[h] He managed to ask, "Yes, Mrs. Lancaster?"  
She said, "Augustus, Hazel is sick. Her lungs are hurting her worse than when we brought her here. She had many tests tonight including a CT scan, and her body lit up like a Christmas tree, Augustus. Hazel is terminally ill."[i]  
Augustus goes into shock. Without saying anything, he runs straight to Hazel's room. Of course she has many more machines hooked up to her now and she is sleeping. Augustus gives her a big but gentle hug anyway, and cries, "Oh, Hazel!"  
Hazel is woken up by his hard crying. She doesn't have to ask what's wrong, because she already knows. She proceeds to wipe the tears from his eyes, and give him the best kiss she had ever gave. They are both as close as they can be to each other. After getting himself back together, Augustus says, "This cancer is a war and we can win it."  
Hazel replies doubtfully, "The cancer is a part of who I am now. It is a war but with the outcome of me losing."  
Augustus stays by Hazel's side all night, holding her hand as they sleep. Augustus had a hard time sleeping in the hospital recliner, so when the sun begins to rise, he leaves Hazel in the nurses care for a few minutes to go check his email. If there was one thing he wanted to do before Hazel died, it was to tell her about that book.  
At first, there was no email. [j]Augustus was applaud but he clicked the refresh button and a message appeared.  
"Dear Augustus Waters,  
I would love to tell you about the ending and answer all of Hazel's questions but sadly I cannot. I'm losing confidence in my writing abilities and taking up drinking to ease the pain. Perhaps you could write the ending for Hazel or take up drinking as well. Life is all about choices, my friend. Although, sometimes life makes the decision for you. I have found this out quickly, as I have been to many funerals [k]including my own daughter, Anne, who is the girl in the book. I had to write the eulogy for her. I wouldn't want to do that again either. Please respect my wishes; this Earth is corrupt with war and disease killing off innocent people. The marks humans leave on others are too often scars. You see, for years I tried to do everything I could to get my daughter off my mind-but my thoughts are stars I cannot fathom into constellations. This is why I simply cannot write anymore. My assistant says I should go to AA or counseling but I tend to find my comfort at the bottom of a bottle. You should try to find a way yourself. You love Hazel like I loved my daughter. It's deep, sad, and a lot of watching her sleep. It's thinking if she dies then you are too. It's trying to remember every detail of her beautiful f[l]ace so you won't forget it if the worse does happen. It's baffling. My daughter had the same type of cancer Hazel has. Love is a blessing and a curse, my friend. Good luck writing the ending.  
Sincerely,  
Peter van Houten"[m]  
Augustus became speechless. He had no idea about Peter van Houten and how he is a depressed alcoholic because of his dead daughter. Augustus is almost crying from the things Mr. Houten mentioned. Augustus didn't know whether to be angry, mad, sad, or even a drunk at this point. "What the hell?" He thought. "How am I supposed to write the ending? He's more of an awful advice giver than an author." Augustus is so taken back by this email and by the news of Hazel, he decides to scream. He screams at the top of his lungs until they hurt like Hazel's. Nurses rushed outside to see what was going on, but Augustus said, "My apologies, I'm fine." He proceeded to go check on Hazel.  
Hazel is awake and her parents were at her side looking the same way they did last night. Augustus went on the other side of her, and asked "How are you, Hazel?"  
She softly replied, "Don't freak out, but… the doctors told me I only have a couple more weeks to live."  
Augustus had already let out all the tears and screams he could produce. He couldn't go on doing those things because he is not in the best physical condition either. He remained calm, although very unwillingly, took a deep breath and stated, "Okay."  
"Okay"[n] Hazel kind of laughs because she could tell Gus was trying to keep his cool. "I love you" she said.  
"I love you too, Hazel."  
"Always?"  
"Always" Gus smiled. "You know what else Hazel Grace Lancaster, I have the perfect surprise for you soon. I have to write it but you'll see."  
Hazel smiles as much as her weak body will let her. "I have something to look forward to."

The days went by and Hazel did with them. Augustus sat by her side holding her hand in one, writing in the other, telling her not to look, and kissing her every once in awhile although having to remove his unlit cigarette every time. Finally, the day had come and Augustus finished up his writings. He let Hazel sleep though, and waited until she was awake to tell her the ending. He memorized her facial features most of the time and never got tired of looking at her. He started to reflect on the good days when they were both feeling somewhat healthy, on how her personality is- so smart, funny, and loveable.  
It became noon and Hazel started to open her eyes. "Hazel Grace Lancaster," she heard. "May I present to you, the ending." Hazel sat up as best as she could, she is having one of her worse days today. Augustus stood at the foot of the bed.  
"The reason the book ended so suddenly is because Anne was the author's actual daughter who did die. I know this because I emailed him and he in an around about way told me. But now that information is out of the way, there's something I would like to add to the ending. You see, I'm not good at math hence why I write. [o]But I am good with infinities. [p]Anne was Peter van Houten's infinity, and Hazel you are mine. Just like the book runs out of pages, I have run out of days. I know this may not be the ending you expected me to write but I hope you somewhat enjoy it. I am thankful for us. For the way we have turned out unlike Peter van Houten who proceeded to take up drinking after Anne died. I might decide to light my cigarettes but Hazel I won't be too far behind you. I won't let you go for too long. I would rather be with you than live. I'm forever grateful to share your ending of life with you. I didn't have to write it. We are living an ending. I could drag it out forever but only in my head though. I love you but I can't let you only be my metaphor. The last thing I will say is, Hazel some infinites are bigger than other infinities."[q]

That night Hazel died. [r]Augustus's labor turned into dust, his sun was swallowed by the Earth, and his love was still with her for infinity.[s]  
[a]This is The Fault in Our Stars fanfiction changing the plot but keeping the same tropes. I give credit to for helping me recognize and naming the tropes. This would start in the canon after Hazel gets sick before going on their trip. Here is a summary of The Fault in Our Stars by Film synopsis:  
Hazel Grace Lancaster (Shailene Woodley), a 16-year-old cancer patient, meets and falls in love with Gus Waters (Ansel Elgort), a similarly afflicted teen from her cancer support group. Hazel feels that Gus really understands her. They both share the same acerbic wit and a love of books, especially Grace's touchstone, "An Imperial Affliction" by Peter Van Houten. When Gus scores an invitation to meet the reclusive author, he and Hazel embark on the adventure of their brief lives.  
[b]Ill Girl trope- Hazel has had thyroid cancer ever since for most of her preteen and teen years.  
[c]Cancer trope- Just the topic of cancer can make people think differently. Sometimes angry or emotional thoughts.  
[d]Artificial Limbs trope- Augustus is sick as well so he can relate to Hazel.  
[e]Smoking trope- Augustus wants to be remembered but in a certain way but he doesn't light his cigarettes because he doesn't want to let them have the power. Also, he wouldn't be able to smoke around Hazel.  
[f]This is a significant transformation because in the canon Hazel does get better and she is able to go on the trip.  
[g]Ending in mid sentence trope- in this book by Peter van Houten, the book ends like this because his daughter Anne either dies or somehow can't continue to write anymore. But Hazel really wants to know what happened.  
[h]Parent's Are People too-trope: Her parents loved and supported Hazel, but they were just as hurt as Augustus and it has been a big issue in their lives for many years.  
[i]Also another plot changer- in the canon Augustus tells Hazel his cancer "lit up like a Christmas tree" but this time Hazel is the one with her cancer rapidly spreading.  
[j]In the canon- Peter van Houten didn't know or want Augustus and Hazel to visit. So it's no surprise here that there is no response.  
[k]In the canon, Peter van Houten goes to Augustus funeral.  
[l]So beautiful trope- She's so beautiful, she was cursed.  
[m]I made Peter van Houten feel a little sympathy but also being real about things. In the canon he is just a real a** by making fun of Hazel.  
[n]Important quotes trope- I have taken bits and pieces of important quotes and metaphors and put them in here. Sometimes changing them around but sometimes they are the same.  
[o]Writers are not good at math- However some how they are good with infinities.  
[p]In the canon this infinity and math metaphors were in Augustus eulogy wrote by Hazel. Now its Hazels eulogy by Augustus.  
[q]A famous quote Hazel says to Augustus in the canon but I switched it around.  
[r]This is a huge plot transformation- in the canon Augustus is the one who gets sick after the trip and dies. But Hazel has died in my story. I want the audience to see it differently with Hazel being the one to die first, to look at it through a third person point of view and not Hazels, and not focus more on Augustus.  
[s]Another one of Augustus important lines 


End file.
